Growing together

My Child Cries at Preschool Drop-Off: What Can I Do?

A goodbye routine, a conversation with the teacher, and a clearer picture of your child’s day.

Kingsbee Preschool · · Updated

A tearful child resting against an adult’s shoulder.
Illustrative image

We asked Principal Keem how parents can make preschool drop-off easier. Here are his tips.

My child cries when I leave. Where should I start?

Agree on a goodbye plan with the teacher, then ask what happens after you leave. Look at how your child settles through the morning as well as how they feel at the door.

Worry about starting nursery or school can occur in childhood. If anxiety keeps disrupting daily life, it needs closer attention. NHS guidance on anxiety in children

What can I do before tomorrow’s drop-off?

Tell your child who will take them to school, who will meet them and who will collect them. Keep it true to the actual plan. If Grandma is collecting them, say so.

Have a quieter conversation with the teacher about the handover. Who will take over, and what will they invite your child to do? You can share useful details then, rather than trying to discuss everything while your child is upset at the door.

At Kingsbee Preschool, new students can bring a small bolster or a doll for comfort. We discourage bringing other toys.

What should I say when it’s time to leave?

Keep your goodbye short and familiar: a hug, a wave and a clear sentence about when you’ll return.

UNICEF recommends brief, positive goodbyes, listening to your child’s worries and practising short separations with a trusted adult. UNICEF’s separation guidance

Here’s an example to adapt:

“I know it’s hard to say goodbye. I love you. Your teacher will look after you, and I’ll be back after lunch. Let’s have a hug before I go.”

Only say “after lunch” if that is when you’ll return. If your child asks again, you don’t need a new explanation each time. Use the same clear plan.

Can we practise at home?

Yes. Try playing school with toys: arrive, put the bag away, have a story and come home.

Let your child be the teacher while you play the toy that needs help finding its classroom. Ask them to show the toy what happens next. Keep it a game, not a test they have to pass.

If the preschool offers a visit, explore together before the first full day. UNICEF also suggests practising dressing skills and adjusting bedtime and waking routines before preschool begins. These practical steps help your child know what to expect. UNICEF’s preschool preparation guide

What should I ask the teacher after I’ve left?

Our school app keeps you updated on your child’s day. During the first week, we share more videos so you can see what happens after goodbye: how your child settles after crying, spends time with friends and joins in at school.

Ask for details you can use:

  • How long did the distress continue?
  • What helped my child accept comfort?
  • Did they join an activity, eat and use the toilet?
  • Was anything else difficult during the morning?

Write down the answers alongside what you notice at home. “Cried at handover, then built with blocks” calls for a different conversation from “remained distressed and couldn’t join in”.

Agree with the teacher how and when you’ll review the plan.